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Disraeli Gears – Taxi Driver

Disraeli Gears is Stonking’s best-known (if only) taxi driver. Generally attired in a tie-dyed T-shirt and jeans that look as if they had survived Vietnam – just – he is…

Edith Farley – Church Warden

Chair of the Best Kept Village committee, there is precious little about the village and its inhabitants that she does not know. She has lived in the village her entire…

Frank Disclosure – Parish Council Chairman

Frank Disclosure is proud of his position as Chairman of the Parish Council, a position he has held for over twenty years. His father occupied the same position forty years…

Review – Stackridge at the Ropetackle, Shoreham By Sea

Review – Stackridge at the Ropetackle, Shoreham By Sea

The mighty STACKRIDGE played a blinder of a set at the delightful Ropetackle venue in Shoreham-by-Sea, West Sussex on Saturday evening (13th). The latest incarnation (a five-piece featuring original members…

Anita Tush – Florist

Anita Tush is the proprietor of Flor de Luna, the quaint flower shop in the centre of the High Street. She is an unlikely florist inasmuch as she suffers chronically…

Basil Chives – Shopkeeper

Village butcher and newsagent Basil Chives has lived in Stonking all his life and was once runner-up in a county-wide Useless Trivia competition. He is the epitome of a ‘good…

Rab Selwyn – Landlord

Rab Selwyn – landlord of The Rancid Polecat Once ‘something in the city‘, Rab Selwyn has been the landlord of the Rancid Polecat, Stonking‘s only public house, for nigh on…

Not Very Neighbourly – the novel everyone in Stonking is talking about!

Not Very Neighbourly – the novel everyone in Stonking is talking about!

Former Stonking resident NICK LINFIELD  has divided opinion amongst the residents of Stonking by detailing the story of the Nuisance Neighbour who has terrorised the lives of many in the…

Howzat! Fire Destroys Cricket Pavilion

Howzat!  Fire Destroys Cricket Pavilion

Fire crews from four villages were called to Stonking in the early hours of Sunday morning to cope with a fire that all but destroyed the Cricket Club pavilion only…

Situation Vacant – Bar Staff

Bar staff required for Stonking’s best public house, the Rancid Polecat. Previous experience not essential, but must be numerate, continent, fragrant and not given to emitting gaseous grunts in public.…

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